Thursday, October 6, 2011

Office Politics

Now, I don't know if you are aware but I have my own business. For anyone unfamiliar with our company, it is called Bush Household Enterprises and it is a small, four-staffed, unproductive company. We don't really make, produce, sell, or own anything. We have no speciality and no skills to boast.
To help you familiarise yourself with our company, I would like to tell you a little about the everyday goings-on of life in our office.

*To protect staff privacy, all names have been changed*

This is my business parner Antonio and I. We began our business together in January 2005. He has been a wonderful business partner, although he has been known to take extra long lunch breaks and show up to work unshowered, unshaved, and sometimes undressed. I feel we are generally in synch with one another and my weaknesses are balanced by his strengths. He has a wonderful sense for knowing when my workload is getting the better of me and he picks up the slack for me. Of course,  there are those rare days where I feel I am doing more than my share of the work and I suspect he is sitting in his office with his shoes off playing Solitaire, but a quick conference (rant and rave) and all is well again.

These are our two employees Toby and Calvin. Toby was our first employee and we hired him in November of 2005. Calvin joined us two years later in February 2008, after we felt we were ready to tackle a bigger work load.

I feel like I am so undertrained for my position. I never really know what I am doing and just as I am starting to catch up and find my feet, protocol changes and I am back at square one. There is a lot of training to be done for our two junior members of staff. They need a great deal of supervision and unfortunatly don't take a whole lot of initiative. I'm sure a lot of other household CEO's will agree that whilst their staff bring a special contribution to their office, sometimes it feels as though the amount of time and effort you put into them far outweighs their productivity. Toby and Calvin often seem like such cooperative colleagues one moment and then they will be bickering moments later.
Their written and verbal appraisals of us as their bosses suggest they may both suffer with some form of bi-polar disorder as they will range from;
"I love you so much and you are the most beautiful in the world"
to something along the lines on;
"You are so so so so mean and smell like a bum burp head".

They have both been fired on several occasions but yet somehow they continue to be employed by us. Neither have their own mode of transportation so they have been sleeping at the office since day one. They never bring their own lunches and expect that it will be provided for them. Calvin in particular can be somewhat difficult to work with and has been known to take off his pants and throw them at you before running to his office and slamming the door.

I don't want to sound like the worlds worst boss, but as much as I love my job, somedays I just don't want to get out of bed. Someday I just wish I didn't have to show up, but as the boss, who else will run the company? Somedays the job is so mundane, the hours so long, and the pay and holidays non-existant. Somedays I just stare at the clock waiting for my breaks.

The truth though, is that I really do love my job. I love being greeted by my happy staff and my darling partner. We laugh often and much in our office and although we are unproductive, we have many wonderful moments. Our differences are sometimes frustrating but overall they are our strenths and they make us work. I have written many resignation letters, but they are never sent out to staff, as I know that come Monday morning, there is nowhere else I would rather be.


  1. You had Kesh and me losing it. Antonio, Toby and Calvin. Best ever.

  2. This made my day. You need an office singalong to brighten up those long days. Might I suggest you kick it off with "love freeway"

  3. WeI love it Jo!! You and Antonio are a great partnership! Please give your staff a bug hug from us. See you in a few days love you lots, Mum and Dad xxxx

  4. This is such a creative post. Love it! :) Stopping by from Mormon Mommy Blogs

    1. I appreciate you taking the time to stop by 2busy :) I imagine this post is very relatable to many families - at least I hope so or I am the only one who loves their 'job' as a parent some days but feels like they are going insane the next.